Sad, mad, happy, blessed= all of the emotions that I felt, very strongly, all in one day.
It was 4am last Monday and I woke up to Brian rubbing my back like he had something to tell me. He had just checked my e-mail (which had been very common for the past 3 weeks since we were submitted to the US Embassy and were waiting to receive news) and he informed me that the US Embassy was requesting more information and paperwork re: Kokeb. We were not cleared to bring her home at this time.
Sad. I started to cry and didn't stop until I got out of the shower at 8:30am. I am ready to hold her in my arms. Her brothers are constantly talking about when their sister is coming home. Isn't 3 years long enough? But, for some reason, now is not the time.
Mad. After crying for so many hours, my tears were all dried up. I started to get mad at anyone involved in Kokeb's adoption especially regarding her paperwork. They have had 12 months to get her paperwork completed. Aghhhhh!
Happy. My friend, Jessica, with whom we met when we traveled with to Ethiopia in June, informed me that they were cleared to go and pick up their daughter. Their daughter is best friends with Kokeb. Jessica and Jason have been through a long adoption process and they are going to be wonderful parents. I can't wait for them to come home with their little princess.
Blessed. The night before we received the e-mail from the Embassy, one of my friends from Madison called and asked if they could come up for the day. So, God knew what he was doing and placed some wonderful friends in my life on Monday to cheer me up and keep me optimistic. I am blessed to have great friends. I am blessed to have my family. I am blessed that this will be an ethical adoption.
I know that God is orchestrating this from Above. I know there is a reason for all of this. I haven't felt this sad in a very long time, but I also haven't felt this blessed in a very long time. I pray that Kokeb is safe, is healthy, and is loved.
We have no idea how much longer "this" road may be. But, then again, our whole life is one big adventure and the road never ends.